The Lies That Make You Nervous in public

As a public speaking trainer, I have worked with countless individuals, students, professionals, even CEOs who struggle with stage fright and nervousness. When I ask them why they fear public speaking, their responses are often the same:
- “I have to be naturally good at it.”
- “People will judge me harshly.”
- “If I make a mistake, I’ll look foolish.”
- “Only extroverts can be great speakers.”
These fears are not based on truth, they are misconceptions that keep people trapped in fear.
If you’ve ever felt anxious about speaking in front of others, I want you to know something: what makes you nervous is not your ability, it’s the false beliefs you have been told about public speaking.
Let’s break down these myths and misconceptions so that you can finally step onto the stage with confidence.
Myth 1: “Great Speakers Are Born, Not Made”
The Truth: No one is born a great speaker, public speaking is a skill, not a talent.
I once trained a software engineer who was brilliant at his job but terrified of speaking in meetings. He told me, “I’m just not like those people who speak so naturally.” When I asked him if he was born knowing how to code, he laughed and said, “Of course not, I learned it!”
Public speaking is the same. You are not born with it, you learn, practice, and improve. Even the world’s best speakers, from Barack Obama to Oprah Winfrey, were once nervous beginners.
📌 What to do instead: Start seeing public speaking like any other skill, the more you practice, the better you become.
Myth 2: “If I Feel Nervous, I Will Fail”
The Truth: Feeling nervous is completely normal, and even professional speakers experience it!
A recent study by the National Institute of Mental Health found that about 77% of people experience anxiety about public speaking. That means even confident, successful speakers feel nervous but they have learnt to manage it instead of letting it control them.
I remember working with a university professor who had years of teaching experience but still got shaky hands and a dry mouth before big presentations. He thought it meant he wasn’t a good speaker, until I told him that even TED Talk speakers admit to feeling nervous before going on stage.
📌 What to do instead: Instead of fighting nervousness, embrace it as energy. Take deep breaths, slow down, and remind yourself: nerves mean you care.

Myth 3: “I Must Be Perfect or People Will Judge Me”
The Truth: Audiences are not waiting for you to fail, they are rooting for you!
Many people believe that if they make a mistake, everyone will laugh or think they are incompetent. But let’s be honest, have you ever watched a speaker make a small mistake and thought, “Wow, they are terrible”? Probably not! In fact, when a speaker recovers from a mistake with confidence, the audience respects them even more.
I once coached a business executive, this guy learnt the idea of converting nervousness to positive energy, one time, he froze mid-presentation. Instead of panicking, he smiled and said, “Looks like my brain took a coffee break, let’s continue!” The audience laughed, and the tension disappeared.
📌 What to do instead: Focus on connection, not perfection. If you make a mistake, breathe, smile, and move on.
Myth 4: “Only Extroverts Can Be Great Speakers”
The Truth: Some of the best speakers in history are introverts!
People assume that public speaking is only for loud, outgoing personalities, but great communication is about clarity, not personality. In fact, many powerful leaders including Bill Gates, Elon Musk, and Mahatma Gandhi are introverts.
One of my best students was a shy, quiet accountant who believed she would never be a strong speaker. After learning to use her natural calmness and thoughtfulness as strengths, she became one of the most persuasive speakers in her company, without pretending to be someone she wasn’t.
📌 What to do instead: If you’re an introvert, embrace your natural strengths. Use a calm, composed tone. Your quiet confidence can be just as powerful as loud charisma.
Myth 5: “Public Speaking Is Only for People in Leadership or Sales”
The Truth: Everyone needs public speaking skills, whether in a meeting, a classroom, or even a casual conversation.
One of my students, a doctor once said, “I don’t need public speaking, I work with patients, not audiences.” But then I told him that explaining medical procedures clearly, reassuring nervous patients, and leading team meetings were all forms of public speaking.
📌 What to do instead: Recognize that public speaking is not just about giving speeches, it’s about communicating clearly and confidently in everyday situations.
Overcoming Your Fear Starts with Changing Your Mindset
What holds most people back from public speaking isn’t a lack of ability, it’s a set of false beliefs.
- You don’t have to be born a speaker. You can learn.
- You don’t have to be fearless. You just need to manage your nerves.
- You don’t have to be perfect. You just need to connect with your audience.
The next time you feel nervous about speaking, remember that the fears in your head are myths, not reality.
As Mark Twain once said, “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.”
It’s time to let go of the myths and step into the confident speaker you were meant to be.
Have you ever believed one of these myths? Share your thoughts in the comments! Let’s break the fear together. If you need more guidance on how to improve your public speaking skills and end your nervousness, contact me.
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